I’m so grateful to Alex for writing this beautiful story about her and her Mom. The legacy her Mom left and the way Alex is raising Sadie is a great example of how love is all we need . . .
Monica XO
My mom was my best friend I never knew I had.
When I look at Sadie and me, all I see is my mom and me.
I remember she would always say, “You don’t get it, but one day you will.” As soon as I saw baby Sadie on my chest, I realized in that moment I only understood a very small bit of what she meant—and every day, I understand a little more.
I can now see that I was my mom’s everything. She thrived and worked her butt off to give me a life she never had.
She came to Canada as a young girl from Scotland. Her brother was the one who got to go to school, since it was something girls didn’t do back then. She had me later in life, and her family basically shunned her for having a baby with a Black man—and him not being around to help either. Guess who ended up being the one who made life in Canada easier for the whole family? My mom.
We did everything together. I’ve filled passport pages with memories—all with my Mama. I don’t remember much about my first trip to Hawaii when I was two, but I remember the many crusades she took me on. The mountains in Sedona were a favourite. We hot air ballooned for her 40th birthday—that was different (you had to wear a baseball hat, which I don’t think I ever saw on my mom’s head before or after that day!). Wherever my mom went, so did I.
She was the most generous person I’ve ever met—almost to a fault—but she was always the first to help her friends, my friends, and even those who didn’t deserve it.
My friends would come to her even when I wasn’t around, because she just had that way about her. Always smiling, always humming a tune… strangers would stop and talk to her. She just had that sparkle.
“Spoiled” was the word her friends would throw around—and heck yeah, she spoiled me the way she never was. She always supported my dreams.
She even came out of retirement to help me pursue those dreams. When we opened up our salon, I remember thinking: My mom has no idea about my industry, and yet there she was, throwing away her security to help me find my way. Of course, she was great. And I was so surprised—and so proud—of my Ma.
She was my biggest advocate and was always there for me. I was never alone, and I hope she knew she gave me that. I know how much I was loved.
My heart will always hurt that my mom never got to meet and hold my Sadie. I’m sure she would have absolutely adored her. She always teased me, saying she hoped I’d have rambunctious twin boys one day. But when it came down to it, I feel it deep in my soul—she handpicked Sadie for me. To show me the same love, the same bond, that she and I shared.
I’m now teaching Sadie our ways—shopping, sharing, and caring. She can strike up a conversation with a stranger and put them at ease. She’s already following in our footsteps with her love of palm trees and the beach, orange fat kitties, and an eye for nice things—whether they’re shiny on the surface or hidden deep inside.
One thing my mom always promised was that she would haunt me. To this day, I’m still waiting on it—but honestly, I think she knows I couldn’t take it.
Until I had Sadie, there was nothing I wanted more than to go with my Mom. But then this tiny love appeared… and I started to understand.
The hardest part of the scary, crappy situation I’m in now is thinking about how crushed I was to lose my mom at the age I did (and no, I can’t reveal her age—she definitely wouldn’t let me live that down). And I feel horrible at the thought that Sadie might not even get that much time with me.
All I want is to give her what my mom gave me:
The belief that I was her everything—
Because Sadie is mine.
Click HERE to support Alex & Sadie through our Three Little Wishes Program, helping families who are suffering from the financial burdens of cancer. We thank you for your kindness and support.
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