When my Dad came to Canada from Germany he made us a home. He hadn’t met Mom yet and my brother and I were just a twinkle in his eye but he already started preparing for the future. That was my Dad.
He found a farm house up north and made his first investment at 23 years of age.
Today, almost 60 years later I am sitting on the porch of this magical house and feeling so grateful to my Dad for securing a beautiful future for all of us that he left here on planet earth.
I walk to the lake and around the property and tears fill my eyes as I want him back here so badly. I can see him drinking a beer on the back porch, turning steaks over on the barbecue and working on his beloved house with sweat dripping from his brow and a big smile on his face.
Why did this bliss have to end so soon? Why is it always too early to lose a parent?
A father/daughter relationship is an intense one. We learn so much from each other and some of those lessons can be painful. Sometimes I feel a pang of guilt because I remember the times my Dad’s viewpoint would drive me so crazy I didn’t want to be around him. I felt defeated in many of our disagreements. I put him on such a high pedestal that even when I knew I was in the right I felt compelled to do what my Daddy said.
Something changed for me in my mid 30’s. I started to see my Dad as a human being. I realized he was doing the best he could with what he had learned in his own life. Just because we did not always see things eye to eye did not mean that we did not have a love, adoration and respect for each other that could never be replicated.
When my Dad became ill we talked a lot about life and death. I reassured him that this life we have now is just a blip, the experiences we are having are lessons. These lessons will make our higher selves even more powerful. Just because the physical body dies it does not mean that the energy inside also dies.
I promised my Dad I would stay open and communicate after his death and I’m am so grateful now for all the dreams, the signs and the small miracles I have witnessed since he crossed over to the other side.
Sometimes little flares and light formations appear in pictures and I know my Dad is letting me know he’s with me forever.
If you missed your Dad this past weekend I feel your pain, we are in this together and it’s okay to cry no matter how many years it’s been. The light will continue to shine on us and the signs are always there, sometimes you just have to open your eyes and your heart.