Vat are you Sinking about?

Have you ever heard the Mike Dooley quote, “Thoughts become things, choose the good ones”?

I love the quote and try so hard every day to train my brain to follow.

Is it easy?  No, it’s tough and it takes discipline.  It takes work, but the work is sooooo worth it!

As the silly humans who we are, some days I think that we are under the impression that if something is not going as we would like it to, then we have one huge responsibility.  We must worry about it, stew over it, and try to control it until it changes.

Well I have good news for you!  Are you ready? Because this one is huge.

That’s all a bunch of CRAP!!! All you can do is control how you feel in any situation and you CAN actually choose to think happy thoughts when someone rear ends you, your soft boiled eggs are over cooked or your teenage kid is giving you the gears!

Yup, you can, oh yes you can!! How devilish of you!! Imagine?  Thinking happy thoughts when the rest of the world is in stress mode?  Just try it, I dare you!  Try it with the little things!

So, reflecting on my own personal experiences this week a couple of really cool things happened:

Example #1

What happened? –

I hosted a champagne brunch for my retailers.

What transpired? –

We only had a few people come.

Old way of thinking   –

Only a few people came?  What did I do wrong?  Did I pick the wrong day of the week?  Did I not give enough notice?  . . . and from here I would continue to over-analyze, beat myself up, and repeat!

New way of thinking –

Our champagne brunch was a huge success!  Everyone who attended had a great time and received lots of one on one attention.  We did more than just place orders for spring, we had time to talk about trunk shows, fundraising ideas and future collaborations.  The feedback I received on the collection was super valuable and I have a clear understanding of what works well for my retailers.  This is an event that I would LOVE to host more often.  For the first time hosting we did GREAT!

Example #2

What happened? –

I started a new exercise and healthy eating regime

What transpired? –

Last week I had a couple of challenges getting to the gym for all my workouts and I was tempted to fall off track with wine for relaxation.

Old way of thinking –

Oh great, I knew this would be too hard to keep up.  I’m just too busy.  How am I supposed to run a business and take care of myself?  Plus I deserve a glass of wine when I get home, I’m exhausted and I need to put my feet up and just relax before I have to do it all again the next day.

New way of thinking –

I love the way I feel.  My life is busy and not every day will be perfect, but  the main thing is, I’m consistent.  Some days I feel tired when I get home and I want a glass of wine, but I feel so much better the next morning, when I enjoy a herbal tea to relax the night before.  I love saving the glass of wine for Friday and Saturday nights.  Now that I’m in my late 40’s it’s really important to me that I keep my energy up and feel strong physically and mentally.  I don’t feel like I am denying myself anything.  I am very proud that I can embrace change, this is what makes me successful as an entrepreneur and a well rounded person in life.  Change feels so good!

See how I did that?  Please take the time to write down a couple of things that happened to you this week.  If you were stuck in your old way of thinking that’s okay!  Write down today how you would like to think about it for next time!

Believe me, your future self will thank you!

Monica XO

PS. None of us are perfect! We are a tribe of amazing people wanting the best for each other.  I would LOVE to hear how you turned an old way of thinking around for yourself.  Please leave your comments below. 

PPS. If you’ve never heard the joke in my blog title here it is!  This was one of my Dad’s favourites! Click HERE to view and enjoy!






Had a thought this week “nobody cares about me or anything I do!!” Shared this with my daughter who lol’d and told me I was cray!!! Welp, there went that dumb, antiquated thought!! Meditated, hung out with some great peeps and #thoughtbegone

Monica Graves

Awesome!!!! Hang on to that kid would ya?? Actually can I borrow her? Thanks for your honesty Laurel! This is so inspiring! XO

Lisa McDonald

As a global reaching radio host, international bestselling author, mentor, coach, HARVARD 2017 Speaker, and a blogger for Arianna Huffington’s Thrive Global site – I have had the honour and privilege of interviewing, Monica on radio. To date she is one of my favourite guests and female entrepreneurs! What Monica does not know as of yet (she will shortly) is that reconnecting with her to host a joint event together, has been on my to-do-list! I absolutely love this woman, her fortitude, insight, dedication and outstanding leadership when it comes to consistently paying it forward and being of service to the collective. Such a great piece, Monica! Proud to be your friend, peer and colleague! Keep Shining our friend! Love & Gratitude! #Grateful #LivingFearlessly


Monica Graves

Lisa!!! WOWZA!!! Thank you for this!! Oh my goodness!! What are we doing together? Over the moon excited!


I love this. We are what we think and it is absolutely mind of matter. Negativity breeds negativity. A couple of things we like to do in our house to keep the positivity going is:
1. At dinner we go around and tell each other one positive thing that happened to each of us that day.
2. Write down 3 things every night that we are grateful for.
3. Once a week we go around and tell everyone 3 things we like about each other.
It’s these simple reminders that train our minds to be grateful and appreciative for the little things and not take life for granted.
My kids are 11 and 13 and I try my best to remind them daily to find the positive in everything and to stay humble always.

Monica Graves

Jennifer!! I love your family rituals. What a gift you are giving your kids! Way to go! I adore this comment. Thank you so much! XO


Hey Monica
This week I worked myself into a lather resulting in a few sleepless nights bcz of work stuff. You know, a type A perfectionist, it’s never good enough, I’m a fraud, lather.
Thankfully I had an evening with a good pal who made me laugh and many stinky kisses from Peaches the unruly puppy. I also tried on a pair of jeans that used to be too small and now aren’t. The Zumba classes paid off!
Gotta hold tight to these small

Monica Graves

YES! Llana!!! That’s what I’m talkin’ about! You are awesome! Keep up the amazing work! XO


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